HATUA YA KUGEUKA IV

MHUBIRI 5:10 “Apendaye fedha hatashiba fedha, Wala apendaye wingi hatashiba maongeo. Hayo pia ni ubatili.”

Gehazi alikuwa ni mtumwa wa nabii Elisha. Alipewa nafasi ya kuwa mwanafunzi wa nabii mkubwa na alikuwa na nafasi ya kurithi ule upako wa mara mbili wa nabii Elia uliokuwa juu ya Elisha. Ingawa tamaa zake ziliikimbiza hatma yake ya kuwa nabii mkubwa sana hapo badaye. Aliamua kumtafuta vitu vya kila siku vya dunia hii kwa gharama ya wito wa kinabii alioupata. Alikuwa na mtazamo wa vitu vya kidunia sana na hata akaapa mbele za Mungu kuwa lazima “amiliki vitu / mali”. Kama wahubiri wa siku hizi, ni kama alisema “… anayefanya kazi madhabahuni lazima ale vya madhabahuni” zingatia maneno yake 2 Wafalme 2:20

“Lakini Gehazi, mtumishi wa Elisha mtu wa Mungu, akasema, Tazama, bwana wangu amemwachilia huyo Naamani Mshami, asivipokee mikononi mwake vile vitu alivyovileta; kama Bwana aishivyo, mimi nitamfuata mbio, nipokee kitu kwake.”

Baada ya dhambi yake ya tamaa kujulikana na bwana wake, ukoma wa Naamani ukahamia kwake na vizazi vyote baada ya yeye (2 Wafalme 5:27)

Yuda Iskarioti ni mfano wa mtu mwingine ambaye tunapaswa kujifunza kwake. Alikuwa na maadili na matatizo ya kiroho kama vile Gehazi; tamaa na mlafi. Biblia inasema kwamba alikuwa mwizi, na licha ya kuwa Mhasibu wa Huduma ya Yesu mara nyingi aliiba katika mfuko wa fedha (Yohana 12:4-6). Ulafi wake ulimfikisha hatua ya maamuzi yaliyo mpelekea hatia ya Kukosa uzima wa milele; aliamua kumuuza Bwana wake, mfalme wa Utukufu (Mathayo 26:14-16). Kabla Yuda Iskariote hajatambua ujinga wake, alijipotezea nafasi ya kuhesabika miongoni mwa Mitume kumi na mbili. Aliishia kujinyonga.

Kisha Yuda, yule mwenye kumsaliti, alipoona ya kuwa amekwisha kuhukumiwa, alijuta, akawarudishia wakuu wa makuhani na wazee vile vipande thelathini vya fedha, akasema, Nalikosa nilipoisaliti damu isiyo na hatia. 5 Akavitupa vile vipande vya fedha katika hekalu, akaondoka; akaenda, akajinyonga.” Mathayo 27:3&5.

Wana wa Mungu katika nyakati hizi lazima wawe na hofu na vitu vya kidunia. Vinaua, Ingawa huwezi kugundua haraka. Ndiyo maana Yohana mpenzi wa Yesu alituonya walimwengu kama vile alijua kanisa litakavyokuwa siku za mwisho (1 Johana 2:15-17.

Omba: Baba, niongoze kamwe nisije nikafanya maamuzi ambayo yataweka giza katika ubadaye wangu katika Jina la Yesu. Amen.

HATUA YA KUGEUKA III

MWANZO 25:32 “Esau akasema, Tazama, mimi ni karibu kufa, itanifaa nini haki hii ya uzazi?

Wakati maamuzi yaliyofanywa njiapanda yalipelekea ubadaye mzuri kwa Musa, Elisha, Danieli, Petro, Paulo na Ruthu maamuzi ya Esau akiwa njiapanda yakampelekea kuharibu ubadaye wake kisa chakula (mahitaji ya sasa) akabadirishana na haki ya mzaliwa wa kwanza (mali ya badaye). Esau alikutana na hatua mbaya sana ya kugeuka kwa kuuza haki yake. Alishibisha tumbo lake, akanywa na kusaza, akaamka na kwenda mbali, lakini alibaki na majuto ya milele. Biblia katika Waebrania 12:16-17 inasema

Asiwepo mwasherati wala asiyemcha Mungu, kama Esau, aliyeuuza urithi wake wa mzaliwa wa kwanza kwa ajili ya chakula kimoja. 17 Maana mwajua ya kuwa hata alipotaka baadaye kuirithi baraka, alikataliwa (maana hakuona nafasi ya kutubu), ijapokuwa aliitafuta sana kwa machozi.”

Mtu mwingine aliyechukua maamuzi mabaya katika hatua ya kugeuka ni Reubeni, mtoto wa kwanza wa Yakobo. Alikinajisi kitanda cha baba yake kwa kulala na suria wa baba yake aliyeitwa Bilha. Reubeni alipofanya maamuzi haya alidhani anamkomoa baba yake pasipo kujua kuwa alikuwa anaharibu maisha ya ubadaye wake.

Baba yetu wa mbinguni anastahili heshima yetu na si kumuumiza. Tuna muumiza sana Mungu tunapomfanyia ibada ambazo zimechanganyikana na tabia za kidhambi (Malaki 1:6-7). Kama makuhani wa Mungu (Ufunuo 1:6), tunaponyoosha mikono isiyo na utakatifu kumwabudu Mungu, tunatoa ibada chafu katika madhabahu yake. Ndiyo maana katika Biblia kitabu cha Warumi 12:1 amesema

“Basi, ndugu zangu, nawasihi, kwa huruma zake Mungu, itoeni miili yenu iwe dhabihu iliyo hai, takatifu, ya kumpendeza Mungu, ndiyo ibada yenu yenye maana.”

Kitu cha kuogopesha sana katika stori ya Reubeni ni kwamba alipofanya hili tendo haramu, hukufahamu kama baba yake amejua. Kwa sababu baba yake hakuwahi kulizungumzia hata siku moja (Mwanzo 35:22) ingawaje siku ya hesabu baba yake alimlaani Reubeni kwa kosa la kunajisi kitanda.

Hivyo ninakushauri uombe juu ya mapenzi ya Mungu kwako, kupitia damu ya Yesu Kristo, ili baba wa Mbinguni akuondolee kila tendo ulilolifanya hapo nyuma ambalo mpaka sasa linaleta mashaka juu ya Ukristo wako.

Omba: Baba, tafathari niondolee kila uovu niliofanya wakati wa ujinga ambao umeweka laana juu yangu.

You Are Beautiful or Handsome, No Matter What Anybody Says

frI found this quote:

“No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly.”
by Oscar Wilde

In life so many people care so much about someone’s exterior, than really thinking about what is important on the inside. Do you have people in your life and people who surround you and tell you, your not beautiful? Your not up to par? Well, they couldn’t be more wrong. All of us have a beauty about us inside and outside. Inner beauty is far more important. I know when someone is saying about being beautiful automatically think of the exterior and do not seek past that. A beautiful personality is far more attractive. A beautiful person possesses mature, loving, thoughtful and honest qualities. I think a lot of people misconstrued (misinterpreted) beauty.

We all have great qualities, and were all beautiful in our own unique way, no matter how we look like, no matter our shape, figure and so much more. A few blogs ago, I explained about Natural beauty and why putting on too much make up ruins your look. I am not trying to tell people what to do, and how to dress, but were all different people, and we all have different styles, different ways of dressing up and that is fine. I am not discriminating against what people wear, or how they wear it.

If some people sit back and think about all the qualities they have instead of being so negative about yourselves, you wouldn’t be so depressed and you wouldn’t sell yourself short. Putting yourself down and making a big fuss about “I am not beautiful” “I am Ugly” “Nobody Likes Me” “I am not good enough”. You should take those thoughts and throw them out to the dumpster and stop thinking those terrible things. It makes matters worse. No Matter what anybody says, no matter what happens, always think positively and always be a step ahead. Life is too short to be depressed and be thankful that you are here on earth and be thankful you are living. If we all take depression out of our lives, and if we take out putting ourselves down, this world would be a much happier place and I would see more people with smiles on their faces. It is not worth beating yourself up about anything. Keep smiling, because let me tell you a secret, smiling is beautiful and it makes people more beautiful than they already are. Smiling makes a world of a difference, smiling gives energy, smiling gives a sense of happiness although sometimes we really aren’t but that smile can light up the world.

Each day that passes when you go to bed smile, when you wake up you smile and be thankful everyday that you have another chance at life, when your occupied with the busy day to day life, make time to smile because that is one of the most beautiful things in this world. The next time you think about telling yourself that your ugly, snap out of it and get back to reality, look in the mirror and say I am beautiful. Make life better and stop being negative. It is not healthy. Don’t just sit there, do something about it. You will see how incredible your life will change and that change will impact everyone around you. Try it, you won’t go wrong.

Rolling on the floor laughing“The good is the beautiful.”Smile
-Plato

Wilted rosethanks1Red rose


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Don’t Ever Look Back

Boniface Evarist

I have been blogging for a while, and I find myself constantly changing the topic and layout, deleting all of my posts, and giving up hope that my blogging hobby will ever be a success.

My style is kind of obsessive and compulsive with a lot of things. I have rigid rules with myself and some aspects of my life. In terms of my blogging, I always used to force myself to post so many times a day, on this specific topic, at this time of day, and I can’t give up or I’m a failure in my writing, I think you get the picture.

I was thinking to myself how I absolutely love blogging and could never give it up, yet part of me wanted to just say that I was done. I always talk about how I want to make a new beginning for myself each time and then something changes and my attempt at a new beginning fails. That makes me feel like a failure and a worthless being.

I look at my friends’ blogs and they are so easy going with their writing style. They don’t have those specific blogging rules like I do. I envy that somewhat. I’m a strong believer that if something isn’t working in life for you, you should try your hardest to change it in some way, no matter how big or small, to get to that level of stability. Writing is something that I’ve enjoyed for a long time. I was actually going to switch my college major from Computer Science to professional writing.

After talking to my Computer Science adviser, he kind of convinced me to stay with my major because writing is more of a hobby for me that I never, ever want to lose. It would seem like too much of a chore to me if I did it every day, all day, and for money no less. I want to break that chains with my obsessive writing style and enjoy the whole aspect a little more.

Writing is my release and it doesn’t matter at all if I write once a day, once a week, or three times a day, as long as it comes from my heart and I am inspired at the time. I’m not going to go into this long, drawn out introduction about who I am and what I’m doing with my life and all of that stuff. Your job if you read my blog is learning about me in the process and hopefully learning from my successes, mistakes, and words of wisdom for lack of a better word.

What I will describe is the title of my blog. I change the title of my blog a lot, just like I said I change the layout, style, and topic. This one seems to be a keeper though. I was walking across campus tonight from my very last class of the semester. I had just texted my one friend and was walking to go get some food at the convenience store. I got a text message from an anonymous number.

I had recently deleted a lot of numbers from my phone of people who honestly were just bringing me down in life. I can come back to that later I guess. I assumed that this was one of those numbers and hit delete, saying to myself “don’t ever look back, don’t ever look back” and continued walking across campus in the dark. Then another message came up saying who it was. In fact, it was my ex girlfriend who I had broken up with about two months ago.

Out of the kindness of my heart, I replied to the message assuming something was wrong. When she texted me back she said that he just wanted to say hi and see how I was doing. When I got the message, I immediately reminded myself, yet again, “don’t ever look back, don’t ever look back” and deleted it again. This lady was, as always, persistent, and texted me again asking how I was. I couldn’t just keep deleting the messages at that point.

I felt almost like the next step was to stand up for myself. I told her that I was doing fine and asked if she could please leave me alone. She sent me another message and I just said goodbye, “don’t ever look back, don’t ever look back” which I know is getting redundant but that’s the point that I want to stress here.

Life is too short to fill your mind wondering what would have happened or could have happened. Life is full of enjoyment if you look at the things that make you smile. I was walking across campus after putting my phone back in my purse when I got a whistle from some gal coming out of this building. Not like the ‘hey you’ one but rather they ‘hey you’re superb’ whistle.

All I could do was smile and watch as she followed behind me until I turned to go to the parking lot. Life is also full of pain. I have a sinus infection right now, so when I did get home I ended up with a moderately high fever and the feeling that I was going to pass out. This was an all too familiar feeling, but I haven’t had it in awhile.

It’s always scary when you’re walking around about to pass out, and when you have tingling in your legs on top of that. I talked to my mom and did the logical things. I weighed myself. I am recovered from my eating disorder, which means I don’t weigh myself unless I need to for my doctor. My weight was low, just on the border of where I ‘need to be’ but not dangerous or low enough that it would really explain why I was about to pass out.

Honestly, that number is just a number. It doesn’t define my worth or value by any means. I tried to take my pulse and it was so hard to feel my heart beat, at my wrist and even at my chest. My pulse and blood pressure tend to be all over the place. When I have a lot of anxiety, it is very much above the limit.

I’ve had times where it’s been dangerously low. For awhile I’ve been to the stage where, with the help of my low blood pressure medication, it pretty much stays in the normal limit. Tonight, my pulse was pretty much right in the middle of that range. I guessed that either my blood sugar or blood pressure had to be low then. What I decided to do was lay down until I felt better.

I ended up falling asleep, which is why I’m still awake right now. I don’t have any work due tomorrow for college anyway because I only have one class that day. When I woke up I was feeling a lot better. I had to take my antibiotics at that time anyway, so I had my mom grab me some food. When my blood pressure is low, I need salt. When my blood sugar is low, I need sugar. I ate an individual bag of potato chips, took my medicine, and then ate a chocolate candy bar, all while drinking Gatorade.

I’m feeling so much better right now. Last night, too, I was losing a lot of hope. I started feeling really, really depressed. It was back to me thinking how ‘no one understands’ and ‘I’m not really worth anything’ and all that sort of stuff. This lady who I’ve kind of been interested in is an old acquittance from high school. He’s been totally ignoring me. That alone makes me feel worthless, yet on top of that, some lady I dated for awhile friend requested me on Facebook. At first I hit the ‘not now’ button. When I signed online on my laptop, his name was still there. It made me think that ‘at least she was thinking of me’ and ‘at least she noticed when I deleted my old account’ so I added him.

We weren’t much more than friends, so in my mind me adding him would be more acceptable than the lady who texted me earlier. We were in a relationship for two and a half years. That adds to it, a lot. At this point, I’m just relieved that I’m almost done college for the semester.

I have a lot of stuff planned this Summer with my family and friends. I have to plan and schedule programming things ahead of time because it really helps my depression when I know that I have ‘something’ to do. As nice as it would be to have a Summer romance, I know that I have my family, my friends, and my head on my shoulders.
I’m still holding out hope that she’s not totally ignoring me, but I’m realizing that I don’t need any kind of relationship with a lady to base my happiness on. Time heals all wounds, hopefully.

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